Night out

We are performing at Hard Rock Cafe tomorrow for their soft opening =)
As usual training carried out at studio we are doing this 70's dance thingy it's hilarious. Imagine our guys are performing the Grease Lightning song haha John Travolta still the best.
Uncle Ky Mun sms and asked me out for a drink at Soi11 after training, together were his clients and friends. I am the only one went with a laptop bag and Digi broadband, *shame* i'm oncall. The music wasn't my kinda choice it was all trance i'm bored. I look around. Why do people come here? Cigarrates? Alcohol? Dance? Socializing? I guess most of them don't really know why they are here, so am i.

Zee Avi - Somone You Used to Know

It was helpless anyway
There's nothing much we could do or say
Darling don't you think it's a shame?
that it had to end this way

So here's to say goodbye,
our love is lost, and we cant figure why
maybe it really is about time
that we finally made up our minds

So Darling, here's to you
i hope that when you find someone new
that she would always be true to you
to love and understand you

Soon you'll build new memories
then slowly you'd forget about me
then i would slowly be
a distant memory

*Soon i'll just be
that someone you used to know
But darling you will thank me
for letting you go
time is not for wasting
i hope you'll find your intended
But i'm sorry
that your intended isn't me

it's not an easy thing
to shake off our history
i know that's what you want from me
but they will always stay with me

i admit i made mistakes
but darling with you it's just the same
if we stay there will be more to make
i dont know how much more we can take

Darling, it would be unfair
to stay with something no longer there
but it doesn't mean i no longer care
but i'd feel like a burden you can't bear

Random Update

Missed my alarm and the Sev 2 alert this morning. Shit. Sleeping proves to be a pain in the ass lately, confusing dreams are keeping my messed up brain awake, i woke up feeling crappy and grumpy.
Turn on the "auto-pilot" mode and i'm good to go, to the office. (was running late again *blush*)
Today was...not very productive in general, can definitely close more tickets and finish that Remedy 7.5 online training. Erm slightly distracted...i shouldn't have given it more than a thought..
Andrew forgot to bring the books, again. *dush*
Meet up and have dinner at Old Town, never like the food there. Calm and emotionless.
The thought about the wedding dinner worries me, lou dao ask me why i want to place myself in situation like this. "It's not about me, it's about the wedding couple on that night...(x100)"
*
Taking baby steps
*
Getting occupied
*
Doing things right
*
Planning on million other things i want to execute them all. Not knowing exactly why i am alive eating shitting sleeping working i just...still doing it.
*

Friend

I lost a friend
Because you do not agree with what i have done
I lost a friend
I am still your friend
I won't explain there's no excuses
I hope we can still be friend

Compartmentalization

Was wanting to do some online learning for work project but the training media player would not load. Issh. Creating hundreds of ticket tomorrow complaining!
Was talking to grace the other day and she told me how guys handle their emotions. They compartmentalize it. No matter what happen they make sure one doesn't affect any other aspect of their life. While for girls, it is a big bowl of mixed feelings. Very true and not healthy. If you can do so why can't i? I took a shot. Well i must say it really work..i stop thinking about him and love and us. I just, you know, being emotionless. I packed my feelings and buried it somewhere deep down where it doesn't hurt. Miracle! I feel nothing..and that i think is good.
For the nights..it is still a lil hard as mind wander off easily. I still cry but wasn't that much now, for i am getting numb. I am going through each day doing things that i think is right(i hope i'm right this time) and not think about anything else.
I love you
no don't think about it
I miss you
no u don't think about it
I'm worry about you
no you worry about you and family and friends first
*
*
*
alright alright i get it
Just do it

Random

If you can see me cry the way i did that night and not do anything(you couldn't)
it is no longer my call to save this relationship

Don't Take Me too Seriously

I still want us back
I still believe in our love
I still miss you every single non-occupied bit in my brain
But i was told it doesn't matter what i want what i think
It is not up to me now
I know what i have promised
But i don't see a reason to live
well
Nor i can find a way to die
I just couldn't see the road ahead
Maybe i will one day maybe i will not
I don't want to say positive thing just to please others
No one can help
I can only help myself
If i want to
Stay tune

How many times can I break till I shatter?
Over the line can't define what I'm after
I always turn the car around
Give me a break let me make my own pattern
All that it takes is some time but I'm shattered
I always turn the car around